The Opening Weekend

It was great at the weekend to play a proper game of football. Football is my life and everything I do revolves around putting on my kit and then putting on my boots. I love putting on my kit because it means that I’m about to play football, which is what I love. At training, we have to put on a training kit and a brightly coloured bib, so that the people on my team know that they’re allowed to pass the ball to me without getting a fine from gaffer.

The disappointing thing about the game at the weekend was that I didn’t manage to get on the score sheet and score a goal in the back of the net. I had a couple of chances but they were well organised at the back and tried to stifle the attack. They managed to stifle me and I’m in attack. Gaffer wasn’t too concerned that I didn’t knock one into the back of the net because it’s a long season and we won anyway and got ourselves the three points we needed.

Getting three points on the board straight up early doors is boss, because it means that you have three more points than you had at the start of the day and pushes us towards that all important UEFA Cup position. The UEFA Cup is top because it means that you can play the cream of abroad and go to some really glamorous places like Juventus, Hadjuk or Atletico.

Roxy loves it when we play a team from abroad, abroad in their own back yard, because it means she can go and shop until she drops with her bessy mate Tania. She always brings me back a souvenir like a key ring or a pencil with the name of the place on it. When it’s got its name on it, it means that it belongs to that place, like if I had a pencil with ‘David’ on it. If you buy the pencil with the name on it, it’s not stealing, so you can keep it yourself. I haven’t got a pencil with my name on it, but I have got a pencil. It says HB on it, but I’m not sure if it’s from HB.

We play another big game this week and it’s a must win game. There aren’t any easy games in the Premier League, apart from Watford last season. I hope I manage to get on the score sheet and knock one in the back of the net, because my agent, Greg, has got me a boss bonus deal for ever one I stick in the back of the net and get on the score sheet.